Vampire Star

I read about a vampire star last night
And finally learnt that there exists a
term for what you are, for what you did to me

You see, a vampire star is a small tiny star
Seemingly harmless
That sucks the life out of the companion star
Slowly, hollowing the companion out

Growing, getting stronger and younger by the day,
While its companion fades and struggles to cope
With bygone days of shine and strength
Wondering what happened that the tides crashed

The vampire star sucks the energy and matter out of its companion
And the companion just feebly stands, not realizing what it’s losing

Until finally the vampire grows and grows and grows
Enveloping all that the companion was
As the companion finally collapses into stellar remains

You, were my vampire star
You came to me helpless, at the brink
Of life and an explosion
And I took you in, let you take whatever you needed

You see, I believed that I was helping you
Become the best possible version of yourself
So I didn’t mind losing pieces of me to the cosmos
After all, I knew I shined like none other

But you took and took and took
Until there was nothing left inside me
I gave up everything as you hollowed me out,
Took away my light, leaving me to explode into myself

But no more.

As I collapsed into myself
Each particle of my mass waning
Pleading to let go
Pleading to burst into stars,

I remembered.

I remembered how I was the star that shone like none other
How I had ample light within me, enough to feed several vampires like you;
How I had come back from the darkest of black holes,
And how the cosmos wrapped me in itself and taught me to be anew each time

As I burst into a cosmic explosion
Threatening to eclipse all around me
I remembered that I was a mighty star before you
And that I will be a mighty star after

And from my own remains I was reborn

I was reborn to be the brightest star
Burning through all of your remains
Burning through all that you sucked out of me
Razing all of your sins

You may have left me
at the brink of explosion
but watch as I build myself
To be the warmest star in this universe.

x

Dormant

Disastrous

Bury

Passenger

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Nostalgia II

Nostalgia is finding a brother through shared love for music
And a best friend through 1 am chats.

It’s late night talks about secrets and stars and dreams and hopes.
Arguments over the best movies and worst bands.

It’s finding a twin in a sea of strangers
A polar opposite twin, but a twin nonetheless.

It is car rides filled with background music and deep talks
And messages that know just the right thing to say.

It’s 3am phone calls and 9pm letters
And words that make your day.

It’s burdens unburdened in tiny cafés, on days that just don’t last long enough
And vows of protection, for better or for worse.

It’s a decade filled with hate and love, loss and victory and shared joys and pains
And guiding voices through all those times.

It’s making a promise that no matter what, you’ll always be there.
And even on days when it feels like everything is crumbling,
And you’re no longer a part of each other’s lives,
You’ll always be one text, one phone call, one email, away.

Because that’s what Nostalgia is, it’s memories that last forever.

 

X-X-X

Nostalgia I

Broken Nails

Gone are the days when I used to tell you the minutest of details

When you were the closest person to me
Even though you were on the other side of the land

Now I try to send awkward messages to keep in touch
And with every enter I press I watch our friendship wither away.

Because I’m no longer the first person you call to complain about broken nails;
And I’m not sure if you want to know about my broken nails anymore.

Because every time I want to, I feel this wall between us.
Pushing harder and harder against me, suffocating me in all that’s left unsaid.

But you forgot about my claustrophobia, didn’t you?

It’s okay, because even if you’re not there, I’ll always be here, waiting
At the point where broken nails and triple sundaes meet.

You may have left the shore, but I was always too fond of the beach to leave.

Friend